Friendzone’s on Easter

What a life. Been friend zone on Easter Sunday, why not? When every single person I develop feelings for ends up dating someone else. I was tricked into thinking that am going to date someone, and then he turn around and breaks my heart a little, it kills my confidence. Really. Despite what the voice in the back of my head is telling me, am not attractive and am not lovable. Deep down how much I realize that love will never coming to me no more.

Why love left me in the past? I really miss those moment when love is in the air.



have faith.

GOD is full of surprises and miracles. Maybe his timing doesn’t always align with ours and maybe his plans for us are nothing like the ones we planned for ourselves but it’s reassuring to know that at the end of it all, what’s meant for us will be ours, maybe we’ll stumble upon it, maybe it will find us, maybe it will require us to fight a few more battles, but it helps to know that once everything falls into place, what’s meant for us will not be taken away from us. What’s meant for us will always stay, despite all challenges, despite all difficulties and despite all opposition. It may take a lot of patience, a lot of overcoming challenges, a lot of moments of despair and a lot of heartbreaks, but what’s meant for you will always be worth the wait. Have faith.

Back to life!

Hey peeps! I hope is not too late to wish you guys a Happy New Year. Two Thousand Nineteen. One year to go for flying cars according to my country’s vision. Speed trains and all the flying stuff. Well at least my country have that vision. Whats yours?

Me myself didn’t set any vision. Heard of this on every interview? “what you see yourself in 5 years?” Definitely an answer that i cant think of. Its you to decide whether you want to have vision, mission or anything like that. Its yourself who will go through this roller coaster ride of life. Nobody said life would be easy, nobody said life would be hard too. And nobody gave me a rulebook to follow. So I live by my own law.

Satisfaction. A fulfillment of my own needs and expectations. That’s where my pleasure derived. I don’t let my life being complicated. I know it such a loser talking like a mad person without any goals in life. Well as long as i enjoy what am doing and complete myself with satisfaction. I need more positive people positive vibes, i need some fresh air to breathe, more good music to listen, good books to read, more time to recharge my soul, more new place to visit and explore, and definitely need someone that can love me endlessly without a doubt.

“New year, new me” statement is so much overrated.

So 2019 please bring me back to life! Show me some love, good years, happiness, wealth and cheers to good health.

Fatin Zakaria

Thank You 2018.

Thank you.

Thank you for being strong when am in pain.

Thank you for staying strong when am in my weakness.

Thank you for still strong when am at my lowest.

I wouldn’t know i can be this far, here now at the end of the 2018.

Life is miracle, GOD knows i can go through this.

HE knows that i can handle my failures.

HE knows that i can managed my life if there is so much obstacle.

At the end, HE make me appreciate life much more better now.

Thank you for the one who stays until now.

Thank you for the one who wanted to be with be me even am not in good condition.

Thank you for the one who stays temporary.

Thank you for the one who bringing lights.

You all are my strengths.

Thank you for white butterflies.

Their wings absent of color.

Reminding me to appreciate pureness in simplicity.

Thank you for the one who give me reasons to smile on my bad days.

Thank you for the humbleness that comes with absence of money.

Thank you for sunset.

Reminding me that sometimes endings are the most beautiful part.

Dear self,

Thank you for this year.

And all of the lessons that will come along the way.

So much Love,
Fatin Zakaria

terribly miserable

Currently on my unfortunate state. Things becoming worst. This year, a year that has thought me strength is what you need more, positive thought that always running on my mind, and never ever stop asking for guidance. From the very beginning, i would never thought that my life is changing from great to very very bad now. Awful.

Keeping my strength and patience close, never stop believing that there will always be light at the end of every tunnel.

Chimmi Churri Cherating

Hey guys! doing good? Gonna share with you about my last month trip with my buddy Ain Radhi. Sorry am a bit slow on my writing lately. So here you go a beach trip on Deepavali weeks. A trip that definitely i wont forget because i gained more weight!LOL so many things happen before we went there. But who cares, as long as we had fun while exploring the city. We didnt really put down our leg near the place we stay, we went all around including Kemaman in Terengganu.

First, the place we stay called Mandurah. Sounds Indian name right? Because its Deepavali! Is a nice place to stay, quite environment, i can even swim in the sea but the water is a bit yellow-ish tho. But at the end of the day am so happy because i got to meet sand beaches, sound of waves and ocean breeze after my Miri trip last May.

The next day, after breakfast. I really wanted to go to this place call Ombok. Some kind of a small cafe own by the local, they also have surfing shop and they also coach people how to surf, and also renting surfboards. Was planning to go for a surf this time. Sadly, waves is not here yet. This lady from the shop told us that we can come later early November towards December. Damn i was a bit excited when i reached that place but too bad Fatin, you should plan properly next time. Kudos! but its okay, we do had the best soft pancakes they served with butter and honey. nyums!

Pocket camera, go pro, phones, you name it. All this gadgets is in our hands all the time. Snap pictures here and there. We even went to this one beach call Monica Bay or local named it as Pantai Mok Nik. It’s been awhile i didnt go to this beach, usually we went for Sata, Keropok Lekor, Mee Calung, and some other things its from the local delicacies. You should try at this place call Che Wan! in Kemaman, different states already its in Terengganu. Sata is one of my favorite even though i dont take fish but this one is acceptions. Than on the way back we had a Mee Calung Sup Tulang. Nahhh i dont like it! its kinda sweet, i could not take it.

Am gonna continue later, need to upgrade my storage! Good bye for now!

I Don’t Get Attached Easily, So If I Make An Effort, You Really Mean Something To Me

Good Morning! Today am on blue baju kurung, red lipstick, listening to TGiF track on Spotify, having my hot black coffee while writing this. Such a nice weather outside to do some activities. Read this & enjoy your Friday folks 🙂

I keep my distance from most people. I don’t let myself get close to anyone. I try not to get too invested. I’m not the kind of person who says I love you before getting to know you. I’m not the kind of person who daydreams about marriage after the first date. I’m not the kind of person who uses words like soulmate and forever.

I have high standards for myself and for everyone around me. I don’t get attached easily. So if I make an effort with you by texting first and dropping compliments and inviting you out, then that means you actually matter to me. It means you are an exception.

Most people won’t see that vulnerable side of me. They will have their texts ignored because I don’t feel like answering. They will hear me make excuses for why I can’t hang out today, and no, not tomorrow either.

I will push most people out of my life before they really get to know me. I will keep my secrets close to my chest so that no one discovers the truth. I will try my hardest to form a protective bubble around me, keeping out anyone who could hurt me.

I’m not the kind of person who is always in a relationship. I’m not the kind of person who tells strangers my life story. I’m not the kind of person who is comfortable wearing my heart on my sleeve.

For me, little acts of kindness are actually huge steps. It’s a big deal if I put on nice clothes and travel to see you instead of telling you I’m too busy to hang out. It’s a big deal if I text back in two seconds instead of forgetting my phone has any notifications. It’s a big deal if I lean in for a hug instead of awkwardly waving goodbye to you. I don’t do those things with most people. I don’t let myself get close to people.

If I actually make an effort with you, then you must be important to me. You must have made an impact. You must be different from the rest.

If I actually make an effort with you, then I’m hoping that you will make an effort with me, too. I’m hoping that you will feel the same way that I feel. I’m hoping that you will help me see that trusting others isn’t always the worst idea.

If I actually make an effort with you, I hope you don’t take my kindness for granted. I hope you don’t assume that I flirt with everyone like this — because that is far from the truth.

Most of the time, I have no problem cutting people out of my life. I feel like the world is easier when I am walking alone.

But I’m making an effort with you, because you are worth it. Because, even though I hate pretty much everyone around me, you’re one of the rare people that I actually want around.